Analysis of Change in Graphic Organizers: Subject A

     Subject A showed significant change in his ability to organize and develop ideas in his graphic organizers. 

For the initial assessment, Subject A did not create a graphic organizer. In his rough graphic organizer for 

Writing Task 1, Subject A presented a central idea or thesis that was too broad, citing the main topic as “my 

admiration for my friend Devon. His strengths and weaknesses.” This thesis allows for too much information 

to be included in the main body, which led to reader confusion. Also, the supporting ideas illustrated in the 

rough graphic organizer for Writing Task 1 were broad and reflected the unfocused central idea. The first body 

paragraph idea states that Devon is generous but the supporting details did not all support this idea. The essay 

listed information about how the two friends met, how they can’t spend time face to face, as well as a 

supporting explanation for how Devon is generous. The second body paragraph idea did not support the central 

idea of Subject A’s admiration for his friend. Instead it stated that Devon has problems or flaws. The third 

body paragraph was focused and presented Devon’s sense of humor as a strength. The details listed under 

“sense of humor,” however, were broad and could become supporting ideas themselves. For example, “love 

his sense of humor” is listed as a supporting detail.

     After teacher feedback, the final graphic organizer showed a central idea that was more focused. Devon’s 

weaknesses have been eliminated from the thesis and the focus was on his strengths. Each supporting idea 

illuminated a major strength and the supporting details helped develop these ideas. For example, under the idea 

“Devon is really caring,” Subject A listed that Devon “wants to support his mom in case she can’t in the 

future.” For the second supporting idea, Subject A stated that “Devon uses his problems to fuel his movement 

forward.” He then went on to state that “Devon’s worries about financial security fuel his school work.” The 

final graphic organizer illustrated Subject A’s better grasp of organization and idea development. 

      Subject A also showed significant change in the graphic organizers he created for Writing Task 2. The 

rough draft of his graphic organizer was well organized with most ideas supporting a clear thesis and 

succinctly presented.  The thesis idea for this composition was “The multiple ways/benefits to relieve stress 

through creative outputs.” While the first supporting idea paragraph was a bit broad with a focus on “stress in 

general,” the others each were clearly defined. The second paragraph focused on writing as a release, the third 

focused on drawing as a release, as well as on physical activity. The supporting details for the supporting idea 

paragraphs were a bit broad too but did more clearly align with their ideas and develop them. The final draft of 

the graphic organizer was arranged more like an outline, however the ideas were clear and took teacher 

feedback into account. The subconcepts also had changed and the central idea focused on the signs of stress 

rather than the ways to relieve stress. The first body paragraph had as a heading “the cognitive symptoms” of 

stress. Supporting details for this idea were more specific and included “memory problems, inability to  

concentrate, and poor judgment. The other paragraphs focused on “emotional symptoms, physical symptoms 

and behavioral symptoms.”

                  Subject A also showed significant change in the graphic organizers he created for Writing Task 2. The 

      rough draft of his graphic organizer was well organized with most ideas supporting a clear thesis and succinctly 

     presented.  The thesis idea for this composition was “The multiple ways/benefits to relieve stress through creative 

     outputs.” While the first supporting idea paragraph was a bit broad with a focus on “stress in general,” the others 

     each were clearly defined. The second paragraph focused on writing as a release, the third focused on drawing as 

     a release, as well as on physical activity. The supporting details for the supporting idea paragraphs were a bit 

    broad too but did more clearly align with their ideas and develop them. The final draft of the graphic organizer 

    was arranged more like an outline, however the ideas were clear and took teacher feedback into account. The 

    subconcepts also had changed and the central idea focused on the signs of stress rather than the ways to relieve 

    stress. The first body paragraph had as a heading “the cognitive symptoms” of stress. Supporting details for this 

   idea were more specific and included “memory problems, inability to concentrate, and poor judgment. The other 

   paragraphs focused on “emotional symptoms, physical symptoms and behavioral symptoms.”

     For Writing Task 3, Subject A again created a rough graphic organizer that contained a strong central idea 

with a thesis that focused on the evaluation of the movie Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. His central idea was that 

it is a “great, fun movie that is cohesive to the storyline portrayed in the books, but he doesn’t spend too much 

time giving details to the point where it works.” Though a bit lengthy and overly detailed, the thesis was 

strong enough to allow the rest of the ideas and details to support it. Body paragraph one discussed the hype, 

promise, and delivery, which was a bit broad and could be reworded to a narrower subject. Body paragraph 

two focused on character development. One more supporting idea would have strengthened the essay frame. 

Unfortunately, Subject A did not revise and finalize a draft of his graphic organizer for Writing Task 3, so data 

are not available. However, it is clear from those organizers that he did complete, that Subject A became more 

adept at organizing and developing his ideas in the form of a graphic organizer. Teacher feedback and revision 

shows further understanding of the planning process.             

     For his final assessment, Subject A created a graphic organizer in the form of a web. It contained a clear 

central idea that stated that “Choices are a bad thing usually.” The subconcepts did branch off from the main 

idea, and the main idea was easily recognizable. While the subconcepts could have been more logically 

arranged to illustrate the hierarchical nature of the ideas, the subconcepts are identifiable. For example, he 

stated that variety is “good but overwhelming,” and that choices leave “room for doubt.”  

              Although he was not consistent in his use of graphic organizers, the final drafts of Subject A’s graphic 

     organizers for the writing tasks became more organized and contained more relevant and thorough content after 

     he received teacher feedback on the rough drafts. His writing was impacted by the development of graphic 

    organizers as well.